Angel Susantin (Week 1) - Nostalgia in a Box!
Nostalgia in a Box!
by: Angel Susantin
(I don't have anything else to put here so here's a WIP I'm working on right now)
Do your parents keep your projects, drawings, or other works from when you were in elementary school?
Mine certainly do and it was initially a bit embarrassing. We keep my old physical papers in a dusty box under my bed. For the most part, it was difficult to look back at the horrendous drawings I thought were satisfactory when I was ten without feeling immense cringe. I was looking at my old work a few years ago and remembered the feeling that I had peaked when I initially drew it, but I absolutely disagree with my past-past-self. I questioned, "Were my standards really that low?" But, when I thought about it some more, it really was all about perception.
Putting aside the embarrassment that I had been proud of an oval face, triangle body, and confused spirit of a portrait I had made of my mother (that I totally copied off the internet, yet still managed to disfigure), I came to realize the prospect that I had come a long way since then. I appreciated the elation that I felt back then when I showed my mother the portrait that I had made and her positive feedback, which made the process all the more fulfilling. Not to mention that I, in a way, miss the characteristic naivety I had when I was younger because it feels like, these days, it's hard to meet the expectations I have for myself. I guess this is something to be learned from my younger self, too; to be more accepting and proud for how far I've progressed.
In that way, when I look back on the work I had done in earlier years, I think of it as more "cute" than revolting. In addition, when I feel dissatisfied with work I produce nowadays, I like to look back on old drawings and think, "at least what I'm doing now is way better than this!" Sometimes what you need is to take a step back and look behind you to see how far you've come.
Comments
I love your drawing! It's so pretty!! My parents also keep my old drawings, but once in a while, we empty them out to make room for the new ones. I love how you were able to see your growth from then and view it in a positive light. I feel like everyone finds their own past cringy, but most outsiders don't; they usually find it cute or funny. I'm sure that if I saw your old drawings, I would like them very much. Your past drawings are what allowed you to improve to the point you are at now, so I think that you shouldn't shame past you. Sometimes I look back and regret the things I did, but I know that without them, I would not be the same person I am today.
I’ve actually kept drawings and papers from my younger self for the sole purpose of looking back on my old self. I’ve tried making a time box back when I was in first grade because I knew how much I liked the feeling of nostalgia. Looking back on my old drawings and papers doesn’t make me cringe, but rather makes me smile at how much I’ve grown. My old stories, however, are a very different story. I cannot make it through an entire page of those hellish works without screaming into a pillow at how cringey they are. Thank you for sharing how you also feel immense feelings of cringe when you look at your old work; it makes me feel so much better about myself.
LOVE UR DRAWING FR IT LOOKS SO GOOD ANGEL.
I hate hate hate looking back at old drawings. Maybe it’s because some part of me just detests how everything was drawn and from my prospective too. Yet, my home is filled with old oil paintings from elementary school and they do not bother me as much. I recently had a friend send a photo of a birthday card I drew on and boy did it bring back memories. I feel like all the little drawings, no matter how “cringe” they are, are almost like a core memory that reappears. Then again, I acknowledge that I have grown as somebody who likes drawing and have gotten better at my crafts.
Your blog somehow reminds of the movie Inside Out, yk with all the core memories and stuff LOL. But anyways, I really do understand what you mean and the your commentary behind it. Teenagers nowadays put a lot of pressure on themselves and this just makes room for low self-esteem. This idea is really toxic and we should counteract this force. This allows for us to grow, but we are scared of making the big jump and no here we are.
Sincerely
Mrinmayee Sama
My parents or myself as well like to keep stuff I did way younger whether it is past works, homework's or other things that remind me of my childhood. It does feel really embarrassing just flipping it out of your closet or something and just looking at it and saying like wow. It definitely shows a lot of progress and how the more pieces you generally do, the higher expectations you have till it is nowhere near what you had for your first work. Just like how handwriting changes I saw how ugly my old handwriting was. I feel kind of compelled on how I was proud of drawing something, cutting it out, then placing it on another printer paper while I don't do that anymore.
My parents, especially my dad, keep every single artwork or writing I have ever done since I was little. I always found it annoying and weird since I thought that the work I had done when I was little was not only stupid but also useless. What am I supposed to feel about my terrible spelling, handwriting, and stick figures? But like you said, it’s all about growth! Occasionally when my dad finds some of the work he kept he would proudly hand it to me as if it was a trophy, and tell me how happy he is of my work. Not going to lie, I think my artwork was pretty cute, maybe not symmetrical and all that stuff but it wasn’t too bad!
Sincerely,
Faith Tong